Thoughts – 2008

A Non-anxious Presence - Listen to the Thought Pod

“It is an extra loneliness to the individual when their work is so specialized that it takes an enormous amount of energy to even begin to explain to others what they do.”  David Whyte in Crossing the Unknown Sea - Work as a Pilgimage of Identity

I sat in a rocker on the porch of the lodge in northeast Alabama. I arrived to the awaited reunion of old friends before anyone else. An unexpected blessing to have that time. I purposefully took no work, no journals - I didn't even have a pen to write this once inspiration hit.

Fortunately I did take along one of the works of my favorite author. Upon being inspired by the above excerpt, I immediately marched to the front desk and kindly asked about a pen. Sitting there on that porch I found it hard to articulate what I was feeling.

A "quiet goodness" is what I settled on. I sat and absorbed the goodness ... the calm energy of good work done well, the goodness of friends, of good lives lived well. Alone, I felt far from lonely.

I sat there in a breeze of gratefulness. Maybe because this was a reunion with life-long friends, my thoughts were of the journey of my own energy. There have been sad, lonely times when I allowed myself to believe that work was the most important thing. There have been times where I've allowed busyness - the complexity of endless activity - to lull me into believing it offered some sort of purpose. It did not. It cannot.

While focus is one of the most sought after treasures of the 21st Century, one must be careful in obtaining it. It's true that "What one focuses on grows." Just be certain that what gets your focus is good.

I wonder; does something 'get' our focus or is our focus 'captured?'

Maybe that is the safety mechanism - be sure your focus is captured. Early in my coaching business I remember thinking a lot about how to market what I do. It eventually occurred to me that the solution was to understand what I do in a manner that excites me so that I can't help but want to talk about it.

Know yourself in such a way that you can speak with succinct confidence about what it is you 'really' do. It is the companionship of confidence that protects you from any extra loneliness. Know and embrace yourself in such a way that, even alone, you are far from lonely.